Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize