We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
