im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He passed out mid-signature
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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