I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Drunk is a universal language darling
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
