on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
