Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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