Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
