did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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