he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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