Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
