I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize