***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
