and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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