She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
