So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
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