I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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