She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I looked at my own cervix.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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