What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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