All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize