If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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