Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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