yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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