Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
