ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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