I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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