you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize