apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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