My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize