I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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