I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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