Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
