Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Shitshow foam night was such a success
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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