your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
