Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
