you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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