I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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