I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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