I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
