I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
