Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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