did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize