Tell her she can't have a vagina
Only a mothe r could love this liver
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize