so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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