white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
