I think i sorta joined a cult last night
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
