Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
