would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize