I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize