I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
