I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
This baby is an asshole
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
