I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
