The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
